Its Actually not that Far

Easter weekend was a good opportunity to head out of town for a few days, so being the religious heathens we are, a booze drinking trip down to cork seemed the perfect way to celebrate Jesus’ big day (s). So we packed up on the Saturday morning (15^th April) and headed down south in Stevo's postman pat van. We decided to take a leisurely approach, and do some sight seeing on the way down. We stopped at Cashel, to see the 'The Rock of Cashel', a 4th century fort looking over the city. Lovely spot, so after scouting around the ruins for an hour it was off down the road towards cork. Passing this sign below

prompted the familiar quote, "It's a long way to Tipperary", in fact it was only 20km. Unable to come up with a reason not to and hindsight rearing its painful head again, we decided we would check out the town. After settling down for some grub in one of the local pubs, and reading the lonely planets highlights of the town, which consisted of a grisly old statue and some swimming pools, it was decided that perhaps Tipperary is Ireland's most disappointing location! Ah, no bother! Probably been built up over the years by the old WW1 marching song.......can’t remember the words…but you get the gist!

I digress, so off to Cork, 2nd largest city in Ireland. Manu (Adrian Kamariera) has been living down here for a few months now, and was keen to show the boys the highlights and fast.

A quick bite at local chicken gaff, which turned out to be the only eating establishment to see our mouths all weekend (3 visit’s…..shit it was the best chicken ever tasted, sober or not!), we were out on the gas with Manu and friends. Queue a painful darts game, and god awful dancing at the local disco bar, Club Havana. Yes folks, it was as unoriginal as it sounded. But the reality of being in a bar with people, who are a full decade younger, does strange things to ones confidence….off home lads!

The nest day we had the Annual Cork beer festival on, now we told Manu that we were coming down to see him, but who can compete with a beer festival. With an all day affair of BBQ and 30 odd beers to sample, Harbott and myself new an early start was required. So after arriving at 6pm (Fashionably late folks) we missed the BBQ, we decided to make up for it by hoeing into the 9% Alcohol beer provided…..on empty stomach no less. We hung around for a while before heading off to the well known Brew Bar/Hostel. This place is run by some kiwi lads from Taranaki, good times ahead folks.

I also must add that this day was my 10,000 day on the planet, so to say I was excited was rather lame way to put it. Got a few shots care of the owner on that one, think it might be starting to catch on…..anyway we stayed in there for the rest of the night, listing to the authentic Irish band, being invited to the lock-in (Our first) and just general mayhem till we got shoved out around 4pm. The rest of the night involved another grubby feed from the chicken shop, and a rather drunken hour spent in the local internet call shop ringing any number in our cell phones. 30Euro later (that’s a lot) we had burnt bridges and abused friends, all class. Apologies again from the lads if you received a call, if not then we must have the wrong numbers for you…..we’ll find them!!!!

Anyway, the 4 hour car ride home was particularly hellish for myself, with a hangover that would kill a small buffalo, it was akin to raising from the dead which was rather appropriate given it was Easter Monday. Harbott was right as rain though, which didn’t help me at all.

10,000 Days

In my never ending search for inane reasons to go celebrate all things, I have discovered a rather compelling argument for my case. A little hush please people, for the my big day has arrived. Forget celebrating such tired old anniversaries as the 16th, 21st or even the redundant 30th! I have found the magic number friends, perfect and rounded. Yes people on Sunday April 16th 2006, it will be my 10,000th day alive.

Now this figure, when said out aloud, will no doubt sound impressive and it is . But its the numbers behind, that excite. I've more than likely spent 3333 days worth of this sleeping, probably eating through 417 days (Hard to tell), Mondays take up well over 1430 days worth...that’s not cool. But then Weekends come in at 1860 days. Hangovers, could be put at around 600, give or take a few. I’ve been working full time since about day 6800. I could go on!

If i had to look back, day 3890 was pretty cool when i found a playboy in the Trash! 7650 was the worst hangover and so was 7657.....1 week later, so not a great learner! 5534 could well have been another top day, but can't actually remember anything from it. No bother.

So in conclusion, I'd like to thank Mum and Dad for having me, on day 1. And to all the other people over the 9999 days that I’ve met, thanks.

For those of you who want to know there big day, just follow the link. Spread the gospel people, this is a special day to celebrate!

Day Clock

duChats

Oh, my 20,000th day will be August 30, 2033. So please keep that day free. Cheers

Manchester v Harbott

Harbott Reports - March 26th

Like any Man Utd fan, at some stage in there life they must make there pilgrimage to the Theater of Dreams (Old Trafford football ground) to pay homage to the mighty Red Devils. I planned the trip a couple of months ago with some lads from work, as tickets are as rare as J Cameron buying a round at the pub. The game against Birmingham was unfortunately on a Sunday, yet the lads decided we should really acclimatise to Manchester's conditions (the bars). So we arrived on Saturday (March 26th) ready to have a few warm ups before the big game. As luck would have it the hotel was in an area known as China town and as we all know theres nothing our little Asian buddies love more, is having a good old sing song (sorry JB I don't mean to generalize your people here). I thought to myself; Harbott this is time to shine!!! Needless to say Dr Hooks "Sexy eyes" hasn't sounded that bad since open mic night at the Deaf & Dumb School.

Match day saw us head down early and into one of the famous Man Utd supporter bars, the Bishops Blaze. The bar was a sea of red with drunk bastards of all ages belting out Man Utd songs non stop. It was an amazing atmosphere. The only thing I could compare it too would be like coming back from a footy trip on the bus except no one knew "I wish that all the ladies".

The game had a few notable achievements. The Man U captain Gary Neville celebrated his 500th game, a new stand opening with 70,000 people packed into Old Trafford to set a new Premiership record for a crowd attendance and the new superstar of English football Wayne Rooney netted his 50th goal for the club. The game was won with ease, 3-0, but the atmosphere was something else. Football fans are in a different league compared to there other sporting counterparts in terms of crowd support. Yes they are hooligans and probably need there heads read but you can't fault there passion. After the game it was more of the same as we celebrated into the night with the locals & then an absolute mad rush to catch our 8am flight home. (Note to self: not a good idea to take the early flight after two big nights on the gas)

Yours in Life,
Steven 'Harpeedo' Harbott